After the crash, lots on my mind. - Wrist Twisters
 
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post #1 of 37 Old 04-01-2012, 10:30 PM Thread Starter
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After the crash, lots on my mind.

So my GF and I pretty much immediately agreed that I would sell the 919 due to my latest wreck. It would make not only her but the rest of my family very happy. She knows I love to ride, but she doesn't know I have a LOT to learn, and unfortunately I ALWAYS learn the hard way. Hence 2 lay downs in 2 months. I was just being flat out stupid the second time. Now that it's come time to look into selling the bike, I've hit a snag. Besides realizing selling it would keep me safer, I realized I'd have to find out the pay-off amount for the loan I took from the bank and find someone willing to pay that amount for the bike. Probably not going to happen ($5000 loan in Oct. and pay $120/mo). She's making the payments as she wanted to get me a bike for my last b-day. So if I can't flat out sell it, obviously I don't want it sitting idle in our parking garage collecting dust. Don't need a $120/mo dust collector.
Tonight I kind of gave her the ultimatum that if we can't sell the bike, when I'm better, I'm riding again. In my mind it made great sense since I'm not afraid to get back on. In her mind, if I get back on, she leaves me. So I'm in a tough spot. I write this because all this is on my mind and can't sleep. I got out of bed and knowing she woke up, I kissed her and apologized for the way I gave her an ultimatum about me riding again. I also told her I can't sleep because I've got way too much on my mind about the bike situation and want to talk to her about a solution where we both agree and hopefully I have the bike still. Right now I think we could agree that I take a break for at LEAST 5-6 months, grow a little more and see where we are, mostly financially and not in the relationship b/c I know we will be together. I have new plans for the 919 and I know you guys (assuming you're still reading thus far) will love it. I think she will understand that if I can't ride it, I need to work on it. That's the other greatest feeling about being a bike owner. Fixing it, working on it, modifying it, making your own. Making it a part of you. My 919 is a part of me already. I love that thing. I love it even more because she got it for me. I think of her every time I get on it and I've told her this.
So thanks for reading if you made it this far and wish me the best on getting her to agree with this. No matter how things go, you guys will still be my go to guys for whatever I've got on my mind.

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post #2 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 12:10 AM
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like you have said and have come to find out. Take it slow. But Riding a motorcycle is not something you can just jump into unfortunately. I know I know this is comming from a crazy 22 yr old kid out in socal. But its not like i just hopped on a 919. I had ridden in the dirt for a good 10 yrs prior, and had ridden a moped around for several years and 10k miles before the 919 (got it at 20 yrs old)... I honestly have no idea how people just start riding on the street from nothing. Talk about a scary experience.

Really what im trying to get at is dont let these bumps in the road scare you away from riding (doesnt look like thats gonna happen) and learn from them...

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post #3 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 01:32 AM
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Take a Motorcycle Safety Course. Make her (beg her) to at least go watch or for heaven's sake, even take it with you. So at least she knows you're doing your part to be safe.

Who knows, she might get hooked, too.

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post #4 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 01:41 AM
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Hopefully you're able to sell the bike; if it doesn't then you are in a pickle like you said. Obviously, your only choice besides selling the bike is convincing her on getting back on the saddle. So list the bike, see if you get any bites but don't hold your breath... not at 5k

While that's listed, maybe you should make getting back on the saddle more attractive. The only thing I can think of at this point is possibly seeing if you taking a safety course (MSF I or II) would change her mind. How you present this compromise will effect how much she'll go for the idea. With that said, you might consider giving some breath time since the accident and the hospital visits were just recent. I'd say maybe 3-4 weeks after the bike's been on the market?? You gotta get her convinced, it's really the only option since I don't see the bike selling for what you owe and you don't want to be paying for a $120 dust collector.

I'm with ND4 on not giving up. Put it on hold sure, but don't give up if you don't want to. And either way, DO get in on that MSF class. And if you've done that already, do a bit of reading...Proficient Motorcycling and the various track related books comes to mind.

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post #5 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 01:51 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by g00gl3it
Take a Motorcycle Safety Course. Make her (beg her) to at least go watch or for heaven's sake, even take it with you. So at least she knows you're doing your part to be safe.

Who knows, she might get hooked, too.
This is very good advice.
Now I really don't think you should just quit riding. Just quit riding stupid. Understand that you are not invincible,you are flesh and bone and neither hold up very well sliding and rolling down the asphalt. I am a firm believer in that if you fall off the horse you have to get back on.
You gotta do what you think is right man. You have to look yourself in the mirror and like what you see.
Just stop being an idiot by doing dumb stuff. You got enough problems right now with cagers on cell phones so be careful out there.
Get back on th

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post #6 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 01:56 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by g00gl3it View Post
Take a Motorcycle Safety Course. Make her (beg her) to at least go watch or for heaven's sake, even take it with you. So at least she knows you're doing your part to be safe.

Who knows, she might get hooked, too.
Look at that.. ^Trolls think alike.

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post #7 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 03:15 AM
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Take MSF course with your GF. You both will have fun.

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post #8 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 03:42 AM
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We all need to make these decisions, but in the end, it's just a bike. When we're laying there on our deathbeds at the end of our lives, it's the people we will think most of, not the bike. Will you want your bike next to you or the people close to you?

If there was a house fire and you had to chose between saving the bike or your gf, which would it be?

Part of our problem is also that we don't want fear to win. We have been taught to get back in the saddle. Walking away goes against that. We also don't like others dictating our lives and telling, or guilting, us to do something against our will. We resent that.

Good luck with your decision. Most of us are there from time to time, even without a wipe out.

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post #9 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 04:57 AM
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Take a Motorcycle Safety Course. +1

Taling a MSC is a start but I don't know how much you will learn
in a few hours. I would suggest buying a little dirt bike .
Riding in the dirt, one of your tires is always sliding.
This skill will translate directly to the street.
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post #10 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 06:22 AM
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I think you (Brewcrew02) are learning as much, or more, about life and living as you are about riding and motorcycles at the moment. No wonder your head is full.

Waaaaaaay back when, I had similar problems. What I really needed was a clear head, and what I needed for a clear head was a little time. I rarely did myself that favor. So, don't rush, if you can help it.

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post #11 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 06:37 AM
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Some things to consider. If you are trying to ride responsibly and just having accidents, the 919 is an awful lot of bike for a first bike. First bikes are best kept small, light and underpowered. You have alot of reflexes and skills to develop. Go find a smaller dual purpose bike.

If your problem is that you lack a certain amount of self control and judgement, then welcome to the club. The 919 isnt much help there either, and once again a smaller bike would help. However, there is one other thing to consider: Take your bike to the track and do your squiding there. You will be amazed at how a day at the track can make you a responsible street rider for months to follow.

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post #12 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 07:10 AM
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wait a second. Are you taking a break from the g/f or taking a break from riding. (either one is a bad decision). But the worst one is taking a break from the g/f. In my opinion, NEVER a good idea if you are serious about her. but to each their own

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post #13 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 07:51 AM
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I didn't read all the replies.
How about if you take a riders safety course before you get back on?
This will teach you some things, cheapen your insurance, and hopefully give her peace of mind.

Ultimately though, if you let her force your hand in this matter, then it sets a precedent for later in the relationship that she can force you into/out of other facets of your life.

My wife makes it known that she doesn't like the fact that I ride, but she also knows that she can't stop me. (having a hefty life insurance policy sweetens the deal a little )

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post #14 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 09:54 AM Thread Starter
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Thanks for the replies guys. Knew I could count on you! First, I have already taken a Moto Safety Course. It taught me a lot but it's always tough to remember some of the important things they teach you when you panic. I do plan on taking the advanced riders course assuming I don't sell the bike. Second, def taking a break from the bike not the GF. Third, this is my second bike. First was a 2000 Ninja 250. Great fun and good to learn on but didn't get around well enough to keep up with guys I was riding with. Lastly, I really don't want to give up the bike. I'm gonna take some time off and let us talk/work out what we think is best. Bocomomark nailed what I think my problem is... Overconfident. We need to be confident in that we know what the bike can do and how we can manipulate it. But I was getting careless in how one can lose sight of how much control we actually have. The one thing I CAN control is where my relationship goes and how well it does. No squiding there. I'll save that for a track day a long way down the line.

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post #15 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 10:02 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ottawa919 View Post
If there was a house fire and you had to choose between saving the bike or your gf, which would it be?

Sheesh, thanks for throwing the moral dilemma question in there! I thought we were trying to keep this easy???!!!

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post #16 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 10:28 AM
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Going down twice in two months seems like a lot. You said you were just being flat out stupid the second time. What about the first time? Do you mind sharing what happened either time? There's a lot of experience on WT and we might collectively be able to make a recommendation or two to reduce the chances of another incident.
I wouldn't get rid of the bike. In fact, I would take another safety course or track day with instruction and ride your bike MORE. There's nothing like repetition to make things become second nature. Pretty soon a 'panic' situation will become a quick reaction instead of over-reaction.
I've ridden dirt all my life and street for many years. I've taken the safety course and done regular track days and instructional track days, and I'm doing another instructional track day this summer. That probably seems like training overkill to most people, but I don't feel that I can ever know TOO much.
You're correct that confidence is good but OVERconfidence can get you in trouble!
Get back in the saddle and take it easy!

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post #17 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 10:43 AM Thread Starter
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mdtoney>> to make both stories short first one was going from one highway to another and went into the on-ramp to far inside instead of the ol' outside inside outside. Side swiped into a barricade wall and continued thrashing along it for a while (damages here https://www.wristtwisters.com/forums/...0-a-29125.html). Second I just flat out was stupid and gunned it to pass a guy (don't pass in the right lane!) and did so in a left curve. Momentum carried me off the road into the grass that quickly got out of hand. Almost got back on the pavement but then the rear slipped out. Please, everyone, don't berate me on how dumb that was. I have the broken bones and immobilized shoulder to tell me everyday and remind me with pain every morning. I was really excited that day and in a hurry for many reasons. My dad's b-day, just got off work, and the Jayhawks were playing later to get into the Final Four. I know that none of that matters when it comes to making the right decisions. Like i said in OP, I learn things the hard way.

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post #18 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 10:51 AM
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No one who has been in your situation will ever make fun of you for your lessons learned (hard way or not). Only a squid will, and well, you know how long that will last for them .

Congrats on graduating to the next 'awareness' level. And welcome to the club.

I would just focus on repeating the skills you learned in MFS. Learn hard stops (not jabbing at the brake but a quick but steady pull, loading the forks).

Learn when NOT to use your back brake, and even when not to use it at all (most dirt riders panic and use the back brake way too much on the street; this is a habit that MUST be broken).

Find empty roads and parking lots and just go through the motions; over, and over, and over again. You want your muscles trained to do what they need to do, without your brain having to analyze HOW to do it WHEN it needs done. Get that muscle memory down on braking, accelerating, cornering, etc. and it makes riding MUCH more fun, as you can concentrate less on concentrating. If that makes sense.

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post #19 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 10:57 AM
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Jayhawk fan... Pretty much explains it all

I rode a bike as daily transportation from 92- till about 96 and then off and on untill about two years ago, and now I ride daily again. I managed to get on a track about a year ago, and then again a few weeks ago. The saying "you'll learn more on a track in one day, than in 10 years on the street" holds true for me. Dont hesitate to do it, infact I think you NEED to do it (heck perhaps you just need to stick to the track all togeather!! ). Find an organization that will spend time instructing. Spending time on the track will help you respect the street better. Sounds like you've actually been pretty lucky.

On the other hand there are more important things in life than getting about on a bike.

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post #20 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 11:08 AM
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Quote:
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I've taken the safety course and done regular track days and instructional track days, and I'm doing another instructional track day this summer. That probably seems like training overkill to most people, but I don't feel that I can ever know TOO much.

You're correct that confidence is good but OVERconfidence can get you in trouble!
Get back in the saddle and take it easy!
+1 There can never be too much learning/training. The one thing that sticks in my mind from MSF class 8 years ago, visualize each car on the road like the driver is pointing a .45 at you. The more you know and experience, the better off you are. Take it like going into battle, you can NEVER have too much knowledge.

There was a statistic from MSF that new riders usually get in trouble in the 2nd or 3rd year AFTER taking MSF-I. They get overconfident and start wandering off from the basics. And for that they recommend taking their level II class on your 2nd or 3rd year... I never took it but I didn't stop reading books and applying the knowledge either

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post #21 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 12:39 PM
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Quote:
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wait a second. Are you taking a break from the g/f or taking a break from riding. (either one is a bad decision). But the worst one is taking a break from the g/f. In my opinion, NEVER a good idea if you are serious about her. but to each their own
So I'm not the only one who thought he was talking about his gf!

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post #22 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 01:51 PM
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Take time before saying "I'm definitely doing this or that"; park the bike.
What's the hurry?

After my accident in October, I told myself I wouldn't do anything until it was months past.

That time came and I made my decision in a more objective view.

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post #23 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 04:09 PM
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brewcrew, i think there is something similar in both of your incidences that you still haven't learned from... and things will happen again until you train yourself to break free of the habit: target fixation. we all panic when we get ourselves into a situation while on the bike. the issue is how long does the panic last for? target fixation is VERY common and also one of the hardest ones to break (that i know of) for it is a survival technique that works in almost all areas of life: but in the realm of of motorcycles, it is a MAJOR no-no and will lead to exact situations such as what you gone through if not worse.

even if you were as stupid as you claimed, they were both avoidable via not target fixating and continuing the panic. what it comes down to at this point, is to read about the common panic stages (twist of the wrist II) and how to counter them and then go practice them. it's a skill that has to be practiced for as long as you ride a motorcycle, the second you stop, the higher risk you run of falling back into older habits.

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post #24 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 04:28 PM
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Quote:
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Take time before saying "I'm definitely doing this or that"; park the bike.
What's the hurry?

After my accident in October, I told myself I wouldn't do anything until it was months past.

That time came and I made my decision in a more objective view.
so Mike, are you done done with mc? no more dial 919 for good wheelie time?

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post #25 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 04:36 PM
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Zaq - I'm done-ish. Very complex thinking process for me.
I still have the Trophy.
My thinking now is maybe a few small rides throughout the year as opposed to all the time.

I've been a parent for 17+ of my 19+ years of riding and have always known there was a chance of being hurt, but with my exceptional riding skills and superior thought processes I figured I'd avoid getting hurt and wrecking my family.

My kids, 17, 14 and 8 matter a lot. The sanity my Sunday morning rides gives me is tremendous. I can't find the balance.
In another ~5 years, my kids will be growner-upper. I've still got 20+ years of good riding possibilities ahead.

I'm taking a break... mostly.

That is a sample of the rambling that's been going thru my head since I was sitting in a ditch on October 12th.

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post #26 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 05:54 PM
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Quote:
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Zaq - I'm done-ish. Very complex thinking process for me.
I still have the Trophy.
My thinking now is maybe a few small rides throughout the year as opposed to all the time.

I've been a parent for 17+ of my 19+ years of riding and have always known there was a chance of being hurt, but with my exceptional riding skills and superior thought processes I figured I'd avoid getting hurt and wrecking my family.

My kids, 17, 14 and 8 matter a lot. The sanity my Sunday morning rides gives me is tremendous. I can't find the balance.
In another ~5 years, my kids will be growner-upper. I've still got 20+ years of good riding possibilities ahead.

I'm taking a break... mostly.

That is a sample of the rambling that's been going thru my head since I was sitting in a ditch on October 12th.
Sounds like a very sane thing to do. Like you said you have plenty of riding years ahead. Nothing wrong with taking a break.

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post #27 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 08:09 PM
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First thing, don't rush to make any decisions. Sleep on it. Take a break. Let your body heal and ask your GF to put off making any decisions about the 919 or you riding again.

After you give it some time, just ask yourself about your accidents or any other close calls and what you did wrong. Is it something you can correct with practice or do you need to get a different bike to keep you out of trouble

There are always risks in riding, that will never change. You can limit the risks by where and how you ride. If you go back on the bike, just try to ride to have fun without getting outside your riding limits or it a situation that you "panic" or "freeze". You don't need to take every turn like you are on a race track or pass everyone on the road. And, like others have already said, take an advanced riding course or even a track day. You can learn a lot on the track if you take the classes and learn how to safely take the turns even at higher speeds. Taking the proper line in a turn helps so much to put yourself in a position to recover from a mistake or the bike slipping and having room to recover. The 919 can take a turn very fast if you lean correctly, if you "freeze", the bike will go straight.

Good luck in your recovery and your decisions!

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post #28 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 08:40 PM
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Quote:
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target fixation is VERY common and also one of the hardest ones to break (that i know of) for it is a survival technique that works in almost all areas of life: but in the realm of of motorcycles, it is a MAJOR no-no and will lead to exact situations such as what you gone through if not worse.
+1000!

I've been working on target fixation with my wife on her dirt bike. I've been getting her to look ahead, and quit looking directly at the trail directly in front of her bike - and trying to get her to NOT focus on the obstacle she wants to avoid - maneuver and look past it so she won't have a tendency to fixate and run right into it.
So far so good; she keeps getting faster and more comfortable! Now she wants a 599!

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post #29 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 08:42 PM
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Now she wants a 599!
So does my wife! There is one for sale in eastern, OR, I believe.

Not that I'm looking at it...

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post #30 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 08:48 PM
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So does my wife! There is one for sale in eastern, OR, I believe.

Not that I'm looking at it...
if you need me to go get it for you and store it or bring it over to ya, i'm more than happy to help! heck, if you want me to go look at it, i'm willing to go ride over there so long as the weather's good and you simply cover gas.

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post #31 of 37 Old 04-02-2012, 10:29 PM
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Originally Posted by Pvster View Post
if you need me to go get it for you and store it or bring it over to ya, i'm more than happy to help! heck, if you want me to go look at it, i'm willing to go ride over there so long as the weather's good and you simply cover gas.
Thanks man! I'll let you know. Still scoping one out locally first.

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post #32 of 37 Old 04-03-2012, 12:19 AM
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I just watched a documentary called TT3D Closer to the edge ... Amazing insight into motorcycle racing.

These guys are obvisouly on the extreme end of the spectrum but I gurantee it will help you make your mind up on whether or not you decide to keep riding.

Riding on 2 wheels on a public road has major elements of risk but with that comes great reward... The general consensus with people is "It's to dangerous, so many shit drivers blah blah blah" If you listened to Joe average and always leaned towards being catious and conservatie in my opinon that would be quite a boring exsistance.

What I got out of this doco is that what makes this race one of the greatest on the planet is really how ridicously dangerous it is and the feeling you get by overcoming and beating the fear you have whilst doing it.

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post #33 of 37 Old 04-03-2012, 04:53 AM
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I think u need to take some time and heal up. Don't worry about riding just yet. Maybe work on the bike a bit, but that depends on your $$$ situation. I assume with a busted shoulder you are off work so spending money on the one thing that pisses off your misses is not the best idea.

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post #34 of 37 Old 04-03-2012, 06:52 AM
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I was in the same place back in 1990. I high sided my Interceptor back in the fall of 1988 - nobody to blame but myself. Rebult. Healed. Got into a serious relationship. Got engaged. Had a couple of close calls with other vehicles that were not my fault. August of 1990 put it into a concreate devider after a dog ran out in the middle of the road. Of course, had I not been going so fast as to not leave myself any other option, it would not have happened. Nobody to blame but myself.

Sold it, got married, bought a house, and went cold turkey.........................for 19 years! Purchase my 919 in the spring of 2010 with cash.

Take some time off of riding, to grow up and Mature. Get your financial and relationship house in order. Then, get back into riding.

Of course this is easy for me to say as I'm back in the saddle now! But one thing is for sure, I don't have that risky edge I used to have. That 19 years hiatus was hard for the first few years and then really hard for the last few (I just love the Honda commercial "I want to ride.........." that was me!). In the middle, I just found other things to do like move up in my career and have kids.

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post #35 of 37 Old 04-03-2012, 07:19 AM
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Zaq - I'm done-ish. Very complex thinking process for me.
I still have the Trophy.
My thinking now is maybe a few small rides throughout the year as opposed to all the time.

I've been a parent for 17+ of my 19+ years of riding and have always known there was a chance of being hurt, but with my exceptional riding skills and superior thought processes I figured I'd avoid getting hurt and wrecking my family.

My kids, 17, 14 and 8 matter a lot. The sanity my Sunday morning rides gives me is tremendous. I can't find the balance.
In another ~5 years, my kids will be growner-upper. I've still got 20+ years of good riding possibilities ahead.

I'm taking a break... mostly.

That is a sample of the rambling that's been going thru my head since I was sitting in a ditch on October 12th.
I'm in the same sort of place mentally, but without a crash. I am 70/30 that I will be putting my bike up for sale in the next few weeks. My two youngest are 4 and 8 and I have put a lot of thought into this decision over the winter. However, I'm not telling my wife until I am sure, because you know how hard it would be to back out of that!

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post #36 of 37 Old 04-03-2012, 07:44 AM
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I have a 1 yr old and 4 yr and a wife that is way outta my league, i still contemplate off and on selling it.

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post #37 of 37 Old 04-03-2012, 08:40 PM
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Originally Posted by g00gl3it
No one who has been in your situation will ever make fun of you for your lessons learned (hard way or not). Only a squid will, and well, you know how long that will last for them .

Congrats on graduating to the next 'awareness' level. And welcome to the club.

I would just focus on repeating the skills you learned in MFS. Learn hard stops (not jabbing at the brake but a quick but steady pull, loading the forks).

Learn when NOT to use your back brake, and even when not to use it at all (most dirt riders panic and use the back brake way too much on the street; this is a habit that MUST be broken).

Find empty roads and parking lots and just go through the motions; over, and over, and over again. You want your muscles trained to do what they need to do, without your brain having to analyze HOW to do it WHEN it needs done. Get that muscle memory down on braking, accelerating, cornering, etc. and it makes riding MUCH more fun, as you can concentrate less on concentrating. If that makes sense.
You nailed the back brake issue with guys who rode alot of dirt.
I rode dirt since I was 7 years old. I learned controlled skid,but taking your dirt experience and trying to translate it to street is pretty hard.
You make some very good points

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